Allow me to reintroduce myself...

Hi there! Its me, you know, Malinda, your Tokyo girl at heart. Or maybe you don't know. It has been forever since I was last here, so honestly I don't blame you if you've forgotten. So I guess its a good time as any to reintroduce myself and tell you my story of how the name "Tokyo Girl At Heart" came to be.

Currently I live in Buffalo, New York, in a beautiful Victorian home and in a lovely neighborhood called Elmwood Village with my two little ones. Let me tell you, I love my children more than my life. They are like sunshine to me and I am so grateful to be their mother. But this post isn't about them (although most of them are), its about me. So let me get back to it.  I'm orginally from Buffalo and I have to be completely honest with you. Growing up in an all white suburb and having to deal with racist microagressions and full on in your face racism from the age of 4 to 18, I was more than ready to flee as soon as I graduated from highschool. And where did I go? I went to one of the most beautiful chocolate cities in America, Atlanta, Georgia. Not only that, I attended and graduated from Morris Brown College, a historically black college/university. Talk about extemes right? So naturally, the most logical place for me to go with my teaching degree after college was...Japan. Now I know what you're thinking because I always get this question; "Why did you go to Japan?" If I have to be honest, I really don't have a reason as to why I chose Japan. I literally woke up one morning and said to myself that I wanted to go. That was it, I just woke and said "I want to go to Japan!'.  About two years prior, I studied in Europe for a bit and I fell in love with not Paris, but London. After that I had always envisioned myself going back to live and work there as soon as I finished school. I imagined myself being so chic, drinking tea, having a sexy British boyfriend with an even sexier accent and rubbing elbows with the Queen. But that didn't happen. If it had, I'd probably be happily married to Idris Elba as we speak. I can only attribute spontaneous adventure to God and that was the plan that was set for me. I was pulled to Japan and more specifically, Tokyo. So I started to research different companies and how I could use my degree in order to work over seas. I interviewed with three potential employers and went with the one who not only placed me in the city, but took care of my accomedations as well. And that was that! I left a few months later and made a life for myself in one of the biggest and most fascinating metropolis in the world. I had no prior knowledge of the culture except I loved Dragon Ball Z and I assumed everyone there was smart as hell. I didn't speak the language, wasn't familiar with the customs or the region and I didn't know anyone who had gone there except a sister a church who was a professional opera singer and travelled the world. Yet, it was one of the best decisions I made in my life. I was 23, a college graduate, really making a decent living and fearless. But that's not where it ends. I haven't gotten to why Tokyo and Japan itself, will forever hold a place in my heart.

Moving is stressful. Entering a new chapter of your life is stressful. Meeting new people can be stressful too. So picture yourself doing all of that but almost 7000 miles away from all the people you've ever known and love. I had lived on my own in Atlanta from the end of my sophomore year, not to mention I'm my mothers only child. Being alone was nothing that I wasn't accustome to. But this was different. It wasn't just that fact that I was alone. I had completely immersed myself in a country, culture, language and lifestyle that I knew nothing about. And any comfort from my own home was on the otherside of the world. Living in Japan forced me to look at myself, to really look at myself. My beliefs, my ideals, my self confidence, my body image, my ambition, my work ethic, my dreams, my hopes, my desires, my short coming and my insecurities...all of it. Japan taught to how to hold up the mirror to myself and that me and only me, was the sole source of my lifes accountability and the key to my own happiness and fulfillment. And let me tell you, that is a hard thing to do. One of the most challenging things in life is being completely honest with yourself. As we are currently navigating this new normal, so many of my friends and family are experiencing just that. Social distancing and quarrentining has forced so many folks to be with themselves and to be honest with themselves. And sadly, a lot of people don't like what they see. But its up to you to change and grow. You are responsible for your happiness, no one else. We can only use our comfort zone for so long as a buffer before it is one day exposed and either we will meet the challenge or we will flee. Either way, that decision will be yours if you have yet to come to that moment in your life or you will meet it time and time again.

When I say that I'm a "Tokyo girl at heart", its not my love for the culture, but what the culture and what living in that city did for me. It transformed me for the better. It was the incubation my soul needed to blossom and bloom. This is why I'll always be a "Tokyo girl at heart". I will forever be that young woman in her twenties, open to learning and growing and ready for the next chapter. Understanding that life isn't perfect and some days are good and some days aren't, but you take it all in to live the best life you can. Now I don't want you to think that you have to hop on a plane and head to another country to experience your own enlightenment, although for some of you, that might be exactly what is needed. What I want to drive home more than anything is that life is a constant book of chapters. And as much as you might love one chapter over another, your own personal book of life must keep going until the end. Then and only then, will you know who you are at heart.