How do you heal when a friendship ends

 

Heartbreak...we’ve all been there. Whether it’s your first love or your latest love, there’s no getting around the painful experience of a relationship ending. We go through all the grieving stages. The shock, the anger, the denial, the sadness, and finally the acceptance. We find solace in our friends. Our girlfriends telling us that that person was no good or are our guys letting us know it’s OK to move on. But what happens when that relationship is it a romantic one, but a true friendship. How do you heal from a bond you thought would last a lifetime?

Now I’m a firm believer that all relationships ends. Whether the relationship ends in a mutual agreement, one person leaving, or death, all relationships will eventually end. And friendships are no different. We’ve all been in situations where we thought someone was A friend, only to find that they are toxicity and negativity was bringing us down. And smartly we remove ourselves from those situations and then we’re better for it. But what happens when you have a good connection with someone. Where being around them makes you better. It’s a friendship where you share inside jokes, you uplift each other, we support each other in good times and in bad, and it just brings out the best in you. I had a friendship like that in high school. I love this girl with all my heart. We were very similar in a lot of ways but still unique. We shared secrets and laughs. And even though I’ve never believe the teachers when they would say “high school is the best years of your life and the friend you make here will be friends you have for lifetime.” Because in fact, for me high school was not the best years of my life. But I did believe that she and I would be friends for a lifetime. However when we both went to different colleges our relationship grew extremely distant and eventually nonexistent. I definitely noticed that she was pulling away but I knew that we will come together because that’s how strong our bond was. I was wrong. and for a very long time I blamed myself for the end of our relationship. I thought maybe I didn’t do enough. Emotionally, I was definitely going through things the last couple of years of high school and maybe I wasn’t the best person to be around. But I never took that out on her, at least I thought I didn’t. But now in retrospect I can understand that our paths were going into different directions. And that’s OK. Because at the end of the day I value what I learned from her.

I still mourn my friendship to this day. It makes me sad that it ended sooner than I wanted it to. But in everything there is purpose. It’s true that people come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. As much as it hurts that she was not a lifetime friend, the love and value a friendship, the commitment we had put into our relationship, and the lessons that I learned in being a true friend will stay with me forever. and for that, she will always be in my heart.