Wednesday, April 18, 2012

It may not be for you

As many of you know, I am not a fan of the news. My mother is always trying to push me to "stay Informed", but honestly, I'd rather just be oblivious to all the crap that's out there. Ignorance is bless, at least, that's what I've heard them say. So when my co-worker asked me about a story about a 6 year old girl who was taken away in handcuffs due to unruly behavior, I had to take a look. Now, just as I've stated before, this blog is about positivity, growth and keeping things real in the present. What I'm going to present may come off as negative in some sections, but it is not from a place malice. it is from a place of concern for my society and world. So without further delay, lets get into this.

I'm not quite sure if my feelings mirror the majority or not, but when I was told about this story, literally, my first thought was "Where the hell is this girl's parents?". There are so many factors in this story, that you can't just blame it on the school or the police, even the girl herself. My question is, what is going on in this child's home that she believes that her behavior is acceptable? That destroying property and harming others is tolerated because she is upset? What is really going on here? A child's first example is from the home, if the home isn't right, the child will have so many strikes against him/her. We have gone from a society that was very harsh to children, you know the "Do as I say, don't do as I do" teaching, to this "I give my child EVERYTHING" parenting. What is going on? Who is the parent and who is the child? Physical, mental or emotional abuse are not the only forms of harm to our little ones. There is over indulgence, non-discipline, and unstructured homes that are causing harm just as much as the latter.

Some blame the school for calling the police, but really, what should they have done? When the administration has called to this child's family SIX times and no one calls back or answers, there is a problem. I work at place where I can't use my cell phone at my desk, but I know, if I saw that my child's school was calling, I would be out the door or in the break room to find out what was happening to my child. What if the girl hurt herself or another child? When I read the response from her parents I was floored. They took no responsibility in this whatsoever. Moreover, they continued to defend her behavior and make excuses for this child. Teachers have it so hard and maybe this is the real reason why I stopped teaching because no matter what you do, you are always the bad guy. Instructors try their best to get the job done in a few hours and they have so many restrictions. They are trying to make the impossible possible with little or no help from many parents. They are reprimanded for what they say, do, teach, they way they look, the design of the classroom, and on and on. If the teacher or the principle would have held this girl, they would have been suspended or even fired for touching the child. There is no win in this situation. My heart goes out to teachers, who are like second parents and they make no money. Where is their annual $300,000 bonus?

I didn't always think that I would be married, but I always knew that I would be a mother. This is my reality and frankly, its not a reality for everyone. I try so hard to stress to my single friends that a committed relationship and children is NOT for everyone. Just because you get married or make a commitment does not automatically make you a good partner. Just because you give birth, it does not make you a mother or just because you make a baby it does not make you a father. You must know the role and be the role, 24 hrs, 7days a week. Everyone is not meant to be married and everyone is not meant to be a parent. It is more then some daydream we had in high school or E! special we watch on TV. Understanding this, being conscious of it, can turn things around for all of us. Just a thought....

Much love to you all,
M xoxox


  1. I didn't read the news article but keep hearing about it in the blogosphere. According to one psychologist blog, the little girl may have a mental illness. I think in times like these, they not only need to send police, but a professional who can handle mental health. I can't imagine the emotions going through the little girl as she got whisked away in handcuffs, and maybe that could have been alleviated had there been someone who knew how to handle mental health situations.

    1. Such an excellent point. There is a problem with mental health and the way that its handled all over the world. Its a sad situation and one that could have been handled differently. Thanks again for the feedback, it is greatly appreciated.